Imagining It's Me

My mom is balking at having someone come each morning to check that she has taken her medications. I was trying to imagine being told the same thing. I certainly don't need help with my meds. In my understanding, I do just fine. In my mom's understanding, she does just fine. It would be insulting to have even my husband check up on me and I suppose Mom thinks the same thing. Fortunately, at the moment, she trusts me and she complies, but I'm wondering when she'll stop trusting me. Imagine a complete stranger dictating what you do, making decisions for you - terrifying! It would like one of those movies where people are buried alive or somehow trapped and tortured - sufficating...I don't know...I hate this disease. I hate what's it's doing to my mom. I hate that she knows something is wrong but really she doesn't. She keeps thinking once things settle down, everything will be fine. Yes, once things settle down. I'm just not sure things will ever settle down. But I am grateful for my mom's attitude. She believes God is walking with her through this, that He guides her and I know that's true. He's walking with me too. He gives me eyes to see her struggles, her confusion. It's painful, but it produces empathy in me. I've never been good at empathy. It seems I have to actually experience something to understand what someone else is going through. So, am I learning to empathize or am I just going through something so I can understand others' pain in the future? No matter, God is working in and through all of this. Yes, I can see that is very true. And I am very grateful.